I confess

There are things that I am not good at (shocking I know- ;-) ). I want to be better at them, but in the hussle and bussle of life, they get put down to the bottom of my list of things to do. So, here is my list, I hope it acts as some accountability for me.
I am bad at...
1. Asking for help- I feel as if my load is my problem or mine to deal with, so I don't want to dump any of it on anyone else, because I know everyone has stuff to do.
2. Calling people- I love helping other people, talking, eating together, catching up on life, and yet I never pick up the phone to talk or get together with people. When I do get on the phone the kids go crazy, so I just choose not to.
3. Believing in myself- When it comes to me, the cup is half empty. But when it comes to other people, the cup is half full or completely full.
4. Releasing my worries- I will converse with God about the worries, struggles, and prayers that I have, but a part of me still thinks I need to hang on to at least a sliver, as if I really can control the situations.
5. CLEANING- You've heard it here before, I hate cleaning. I love a clean house, but I hate to be the one who has to make it that way. This goes back since I was a kid (you know mom!). I get so distracted by everything else, that I completely forget what I was doing and then there is a bigger mess than before. It's like how some people can't read with music or tv on, I can't clean with anyone around me, or I fail miserably.
6. Waking up early- The problem starts with going to bed early to wake up early. I still have the hopes of waking up at 6:30 everyday to workout. It's only happened once. Here is my legitimate excuse- Brenton works til 10 many nights and doesn't get home til almost 11 so I want to see and talk with him before the whole routine starts again in the morning. So we are up til 12-1 and then the kids want to be up at 7:30a I am wiped out!

That's all for now. I think that is enough things to try and be better at. I really do intend to at least try to be better.

Caffine high

I feel like I am having a sugar high. I feel like I am shaking and adrenaline is trying to get out of my body. My mind is moving a million miles an hour and I can't stop. So, I am going to try to write it all down so I can get a grip.

I have to clean the house- it's trashed
Laundry
Wash sheets
Insurance on car
Tupperware parties to enter
Tupperware hosts to call
Tupperware parties to plan for
Contact Tupperware team
Finish painting the hallway, and entryway
Take the kids outside
Exercise
Eat better (again)
Finish resume
Apply for job (I'll disclose later)
Practice writing Jacob's name
Mother's day
Brenton's work stuff
Unload the dishwasher
Pack up things that are unnecessary
Read my Bible
Go to the post office
Make lunch
Call a couple friends
Get ink for the printer

I think that's all for now. It feels better to get it out. Now I can slowly work through it. I got a babysitter for an hour today. I feel like it would be beneficial for me to work on the house, but I think the only thing I am going to do is go exercise. Hopefully that will help me refocus. Until then, I will make lunch and pick up toys.