Changing buds

When Jacob was little he would eat every and anything! It was so nice to not have a picky eater. Same with Izzy and now Andrew, but lately it seems like someone somewhere told them things were disgusting, gross, and not worth trying. Little things like sausage pizza which he loved is not gross and he only wants cheese-huh? Well this morning, I reheated some Chicken Pot pie for breakfast (yea, yea I know it's not breakfast food, but why??? That's an entirely different blog entry). Jacob has eaten this before and loved it. So this morning when he insisted that he didn't like it I made him at least try it before he could have some orange slices. Well, it finally happened, he gagged 3 times and then it was all over... up came the juice from earlier. He was scared that I was going to come down on him (which I didn't) and ran into the bathroom. He could have swallowed the bite, but he let it sit in his mouth and didn't want to chew or swallow. Ironically he didn't puke out the bite, so he continued to chew it up and swallow it- that stinker!

Did this happen to other kids? Do their taste buds change or something? Why does he eat anything one day and another day he won't. I must admit Jacob is still a great eater- he usually clears his plate and wants more, but it is usually the same old thing. I like to cook and create different things, but when Brenton and I are the only ones to eat them, it's kind of a waste. Any suggestions?

No rub a dub dub

Andrew HATES the bath, in fact, he hates any activity that includes getting wet. This is much like his father, I didn't know that this could be inherited? So, this evening after dinner, the kids were covered with sauce. I figured the easiest way to clean them completely was to bathe them. Brenton and I know that it will be a short, but loud process to bathe Andrew so we are prepared with soap, water and towels readily available. The instant he knows he is going into the bath, he SCREAMS. If the windows were open, it would sound as if we were torturing him. Tonight, was no different except for surprise he had for me when I put him in. He was screaming, like usual, but this time just as I put his bottom in the tub, he pooped! With great surprise, I screamed for Brenton to come up and help me. After all the chaos and commotion, I cleaned out the tub. But because the Lord has instilled me stubbornness, I was not going to let him off the hook, so I put him back in, and finished out the bath. I don't to be the mom of the "smelly kid" at school someday. I can clearly remember who the smelly kids were in my classes, I surely don't want Andrew to be that kid!
I don't get it! My other kids LOVE water and would stay in the bath or pool all day if I would let them. We didn't do anything different with him, but he hates it. Does anyone else have this problem, or any suggestions?

No words

The pink ribbon has been on my mind a lot lately. First, my aunt found out she has skin cancer and now I found out that a woman I sell Tupperware with was diagnosed with Breast cancer. I am having a difficult time wrapping my head around it all. She is only 30 years old with 2 kids. She recently started selling Tupperware so she could quit her job and stay home. Within the past month she finally did quit her job and has been loving being at home with the little one and the other is in school! My eyes well up with tears every time I think about those little kids and not comprehending why there mommy might be sad or feel sick. I play out in my head having to sit my kids down and explain such 'over their head' things like Chemo therapy, radiation and what that might mean for the family. She mentioned that the kids are already are asking if they did anything to cause it, or can they do anything to make it go away. WHOA- what a burden they lay upon themselves without needing to. As I search for some inspiring or uplifting things to say to her, I always find myself thinking,What if it was me? What would I do? How would I act? What would I want people to say or not say? I still don't think I've come up with anything good. She is strong and courageous so far, she is looking up and knowing that she will come out on top, and through it all God will make her a better person for it. I pray that she keeps her spirits up, and that she does beat this. I pray I have the right words or truth for her when she needs them most and I mostly pray for her children and husband that they to have the faith it will take to make it through.

Craigs list?

I am in the market for a laser printer. However, I do not have the cash flow for a new one. I have heard people talk about listing or purchasing items on Craigslist, but I don't know much about it. I found some really nice printers for great prices, but I am afraid to get scammed. So, I am wondering who has used Craigslist? How does the system work? What are some helpful hints to purchasing something from it? Here is the printer I am inquiring about. Do you know anyone that is selling a laser printer?

WHY do we live here?

It's cold again and I hate it. The ground is coated with a layer of snow. It's almost worse in April than in January because we expect to be done with this nonsense by now. It was 80 degrees a week ago and today it's 30 something. Someone please tell me the benefits to this tundra that we live in. Some friends at Reston baby are enjoying 80 degrees and days at the beach. So Minnesotans, what's so great about here???

Disappointed

Last week I got a phone call from the Rachael Ray show. As I have mentioned I love her new talk show. A few weeks back I had emailed in some stories on the web site about being on the show. So, you can imagine my excitement when I got a voice mail that said this,
"Hi Stephanie, this is Paul from the Rachael Ray show in New York City. We got your emails and I would love to talk with you more about what you sent in. Please call me back at your earliest convinence at..."
Since then, I have called them back and left 2 messages and spoken once with Paul, and he told me he would call me back when he was done with an email he was sending (he never called me back). I am so bummed that I haven't heard anything yet. Should I keep calling? Or should I let it go and live in the moment that I got a call in the first place? I really want to go to the show, and if they will pay for it, then that's a bonus! Audra, as someone who has worked in TV, what do you think???

Female= worrier?

Living in MN all my life, I am used to experiencing snow storms so I don't get overly scared about driving in them. However, I do cautiously drive and I do worry about my loved ones driving in the snow. Why- I don't know? As I was driving in a snow storm recently with the kids I started to wonder if females are natural born worriers?
As I pulled out of the cultisac that we live in our tires spun a bit and it jolted the van a little. Isabelle immediately said in a scared/worried tone, "Mommy, be careful" and without hesitation Jacob chimed in with "No, don't be careful- go fast."

So, do you think females are born to worry? Is it what God intended? Is it a form of caring? Is it a sin? Are males natural non worriers?

I'm a big kid now

I wish this phrase was true for me, "I'm a big kid now." If I was a "big kid" wouldn't I just be a taller version of my children? Wouldn't I get excited about playing, wrestling, dressing up and pretending? I realized today that I have lost a lot of my ability to just "play". Jacob (our oldest) asked me to play with him today, he wanted me to pretend that I was a dinosaur and he was a horse (Crazy imagination, I know). I was really trying hard to get into character, but I just couldn't. I tried to make my voice deep, and walk with slow heavy steps, but in all reality I could only keep it going 2 minutes max. I then started thinking about when we lose our ability to play like children? Jacob could do this for hours, he could make up a character and act it out, especially if he is in water. I don't get it, I used to love playing on the floor with kids. I babysat since I was 12 and I was always playing on the floor and making things up with kids. I was a kindergarten teacher that loved doing art projects and pretending things. Why then, does it seem so hard now? I thought it would be easier with my own children. All I could think about was the laundry in the washing machine, the dirty dishes, dinner, nap time, checking the bank account, and the list goes on. I felt so bad for Jacob and Isabelle that I couldn't get into character for longer and make it really fun for them.

So, where does our childlikeness go? Or I guess a better questions is, where did MY childlikeness go? Am I the only one who struggles with this? I feel like I'm turning into a constant grouchy momwho spends the day watching for opportunities to discipline and correct their behavior. I really don't like myself lately. Does anyone have a way that I can find that fun mom who loves games, playing, tickling, pretending, and making life more exciting because I can't seem to find her.

Hope?

Proverbs 3;5-6

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;

6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

I have read and heard these verses so many times since I've been a Christian. But what do they really mean to me? I have been thinking a lot about the the word hope. In my little devotional book this is the verse I was led to when looking up hope. What is hope? Is it a feeling or a thought? What does it mean to, "hold onto hope"? "Be hopeful"? "Hope for the best"? Are hope and trusting in the Lord the same? I have heard it, seen it, read it, and talked about it. Now I am trying to experience it, and wait for it. But I have to ask myself, what am I really waiting or "hoping" for?

The spirit of Christmas

Something is different about me this Christmas season. As you know, I did not put up a Christmas tree- this is really out of character for me, since last year I put it up the second weekend in November. Then today I was listening to Christmas music in the car and got really annoyed. Again, this is really out of character, because I typically love Christmas music any time of the year. Maybe I'm in a strange funk, maybe I am just tired, or maybe something in me is changing. I don't know what it could be.
One thing I struggle with every year for as long as I can remember is controlling how much I spend. I LOVE giving gifts to people. It brings me so much joy to see people's faces when they get something they really like, and I was the giver. Is that selfish? And yet again, I am in the same predicament this year- I want to give, more than I can afford. Thankfully, this year I started shopping a little earlier to spread the expenses out. Otherwise it seems like I spend so much in December that it takes me a year to pay for it all and then it's time to do it again. So, spreading it out seems to be working really well. I get really sad when I know that I can't afford to get someone a gift that I know they would love. It makes me sad to put a cap on spending. I don't get this way the rest of the year, it's only at Christmas time. I wish I could give everyone who has ever done a service for me a gift. What's up with that? I would give the mail man, garbage man, babysitters, stylist, pastors, neighbors, and anyone else I could think of a gift if I could.
I know the real reason we celebrate Christmas. But I also know the season of giving is so energizing for me. So, how do I deal with this in a healthy way? How do I realize my boundaries in giving and spending because the reality is the money I do spend on gifts I could use to pay down debt or use on bills. I feel like I should give to anyone I can, but at the same time I feel like I shouldn't.
Well, that's a little into my world at Christmas time- I would love some suggestions of how others give without breaking the bank.